Dynamics of Success – Professional and Personal
Before we jump into looking how to achieve success or be successful at something, we must first define what success means. The question we must answer is “What is Success?”
Each person needs to answer this for themselves before one can measure how successful they are or want to be in life. Everyone has their own definition of success, how they see it and how they measure it. In fact it can change and will change based on the situation and what the context is.
So how do you measure it?
- Social Status
- Career / Position
Most likely is a combination of all of the above. I encourage everyone to step back at this point and make their own definition of success at this point. Write it down, have it available to look at each and everyday. Try an incorporate a few of the points above, because it is easy to say,
“I want to be successful, I want to be a millionaire. If I am millionaire, then I am successful and everything else will work out.”
I have heard this, or a variation of this time and time again. Well I will tell you, from first hand experience, I know a few millionaires, and just because they have wealth, doesn’t make them happy. I know a few that are down right miserable, even though they have enough money to do whatever they please in life. My personal motto on this is “Money doesn’t buy happiness, but it can certainly pave the way”.
That being said, let me share with you my personal definition of success below, and understand this isn’t a static thing, it changes from time to time and has changed over the years as I have aged, and have had different priorities in life.
Success is the accomplishment of my goals, in a meaningful way that fulfills me spiritually, emotionally and monetarily, enhancing my life, while providing others with value to help fulfill their goals and help them on their journey.
If I may break this down for a moment to address the various aspects that this definition provides. First is defines clearly that I am seeking to accomplish my goals, in a manner that makes me happy, is profitable monetarily, and enhances my life, which in turn enhances the lives of those in my life. In addition, I seek my success to enhance others lives, by providing value in my success. This is true if it is in a business that I own or in a business where I work for someone else as an employee or contractor. It is also true in any of educational endeavors. I believe in being selfless in the process, because I believe that if you provide others with value, you will get value in return.
An example of this is if I am working as a manager for someone else company. I measure my success as a manager not only by the value I provide to the ownership and their business, but to the other employees, vendors and suppliers I work with. If I provide them with value, to accomplish their goals, job duties and the like, while fulfilling mine, that value provided to them will help me accomplish my goals in the end. When managing people, if you provide those subordinates with value, they will be able to accomplish their job duties, which in turn accomplishes my job duties and so on and so forth. So that being said, if you can be work to accomplish your goals, while being selfless, you will find great success, is a mantra of mine.
Now that we have talked about success and how we define it, which is also then how we measure it, lets touch base on a few things I believe are important to obtaining success, achieving our goals and good life in general.
Attitude & Perspective – Be Positive.
Simple to say right? Be Positive. Two very simple words. These two simple words have probably given me the biggest challenges in life. Being positive is not easy, in fact it can be down right one of the hardest things in life. In all areas of life, from financial, to health, to our careers, things happen in life and it isn’t easy to stay positive about them all the time.
A great example of this is illness. It starts with a sneeze, a scratch in throat, maybe a little pressure in your face. You think, “Oh No!”, you don’t want to admit it, but in the back of your mind you can’t help but think, “I am getting sick!”. “I can’t be getting sick, I have far to much going on right now, far to much at work, I can’t get sick right now.” Over the next few days it hits you, bam, full on cold. You think to yourself, “I knew it, I knew this was going to happen”, “why me, why do I always get sick like this” and it goes on down the rabbit hole. This is not to say that staying positive will stop you from catching a cold, but it is all about how you approach life circumstances. When things go “south”, it is easy for your mentality to go south with them.
What I will say, briefly here and will link up a full article at a later time on the subject, is that I believe in the Law of Attraction. In so much that positive thoughts and positive attitude, breed positive results. The same can be said for negative thoughts and a pessimistic attitude, breed negative results. I believe we all attract what we put out into the world, through our thoughts, words and actions, consciously and unconsciously.
There is a great short story that I feel pertains to this. I can’t claim to know its origination, best I can figure it is of Native American origin, although its origin is unknown. It goes something like this, which is from the Podcast called “The One You Feed”, located here: https://www.oneyoufeed.net/tale-of-two-wolves/
“A grandfather is talking with his grandson and he says there are two wolves inside of us which are always at battle.
One is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery, and love. The other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed, hatred, and fear.
The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?”
The grandfather quietly replies, “The one you feed.” “
I can’t agree more. Negativity, Positivity, your attitude, your outlook, it is all about which you feed and whichever one you feed, you will get. It becomes your filter for life. Everything experience will go through the filter that you feed and you will see it from that perspective.
A great example of perspective is this picture, some people see an old woman, and some see a young woman. All depends what you focus on, its both.
That all being said, I believe staying positive, looking on the bright side, remaining calm and collected while facing the many challenges ahead. This will put anyone in the best position to overcome those challenges and crush their goals. Keep your head up, even when you feel defeated, because some of the most successful people in life have fallen down more times than you can imagine. Its about getting back on your feet again and keep going.
Balance, Finding an Upper Hand & Patience – Oh Yeh and SLEEP!
More often than not, the reason many people are successful over the far more many that are not, is because they have patience and understand that things do not happen over night. Successful people have the dedication to their goal and do not give up. So many people give up far to early and far to easily. In my opinion it is mostly because of their approach to their goals and they loose sight of the result they are looking for. You need to work at things a little bit everyday, find balance in your life and schedule and for gosh sakes, don’t forget to sleep.
The Slight Edge by Jeff Olsen is a fantastic book on this subject and I highly recommend you read it. I could go on for a very long time and probably will at some point about this topic, but for the sake of this series I will keep it brief. The main things you need to understand are that:
A) Things will not happen over night; change and reaching goals takes time.
B) It is important to work at your goals every day just a little.
i. A Little bit everyday is worth more than doing nothing all week and just working hard for 12 hours on the weekend to make up for it.
Jeff uses a great example in his book about our health and eating habits. A very simplified example is that eating bad all week, and eating healthy on the weekends is not the same, nor as beneficial as eating a little healthy everyday and building those healthy habits a little bit everyday through the little choices (ie, what you have for a snack from the vending machine, or what you choose to drink when thirsty).
The upper hand you will find you have is the discipline you have to work at your goals a little bit everyday, which over time leads to large progress. Where others may start, go really hard and drop off, you will work slowly and steadily. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Wake up 30 minutes early, or don’t watch two hours of TV each night, just watch one and work the other one. You need to find balance in this. You can not for-go the little things that you enjoy in your life, like a tv show, coffee with a friend, or reading a book, etc.
Sleep, this is a super important thing our bodies need to function and if you don’t sleep enough you’ll be no good to your goals, life or family. Everything needs to be done in balance, or you will end up burnt out, been there, done that, don’t do it. If you stop and look at your day and your routine you will find opportunities to unlock some extra time that you can use to further your goals. Be it cutting out that second hour of tv time, or working on your goal while you eat lunch, or skip going out to breakfast and eating from home instead, there are many ways we can adjust ourselves without having to make dramatic changes in the routine and lifestyle we enjoy.
I wrote this long post, mostly in my mornings while enjoying my coffee, in between my stretching routine, breakfast and catching up on the morning news. Editing and finalization has been taking place while enjoying some hookah, a nice smoothy and a little bit of dinner. I estimate that it has taken me a little over a month to compile this information, editing and posting will probably take a week or two. Just a little bit everyday, here and there where I have time, while I execute my life goals, work goals and family affairs.
Flexibility, Change and Going With the Flow
Life is a winding a path, a journey that does not travel a straight line, it goes up, down, left, right, sometimes it even feels like to goes backward. Paths to achieving success and ones goals, behave exactly the same way. It is important to remember this, and that remaining flexible on this path is important to maintaining the course.
The path that you take may and will most likely not be well defined when you envision and define your dream and goals. It will appear along the way as you work towards it. It will change as you travel the path and you must be ok with that. Sometimes it will even feel like you are going backwards. I am sure you have heard about taking one step back to take two steps forward. This will happen, positive thinking and remaining flexible will allow you to recognize when this happens and how to leverage it to boost yourself forward those two steps.
Sometimes you may even feel like you made the wrong decision or spent time working on something trivial that didn’t end up mattering. Do not get down on yourself or be to hard on yourself, these things happen and with a positive mindset you can look at the situation and find out what you took away from it. Call it a silver lining if you like, but just because something does not pan out the way you thought it would, does not mean that it was a lost cause or a waste of time.
An example from my own life from this was two years I spent on an early entrepreneurial adventure. I won’t go into detail in this series but will just say I ended up loosing money, walking away with problems in my personal life and left myself at a point that I had to rebuild. I certainly could have felt like I was a failure and in utter ruin. However, I looked at it, that I had learned so much about business, people, entrepreneurship, and so much about myself. This experience was not a waste of two years and tens of thousands of dollars, but one of greatest experiences of my life that has lead me down the path I am continuing on today and has made me whom I am. It has helped me define who I am, and what I want out of my life.
With that, I leave you for this post. I hope this has provided you with value in one way or another. I am working at providing this information and much more, complied into an Ultimate Guide that will be available at some point in the future. If you would like to stay on top of my work or open a conversation, it would mean a lot to me if you would subscribe to the email list located at multiple points on this post. I will keep you posted, not spam you and soon be launching a podcast as well! Thanks for your time, I greatly appreciate it.
The Business Mentors Code Of Honor
We Will Never Charge A Subscription Fee
We Will Not Spam Or Overwhelm Your Inbox
We Will Not Sell Your Email Address or Information
Making Friends Is Our Business
We Operate With Integrity, Honesty and Transparency